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279They could not paint or write or do anything ever: so that, being a man,one had to respect him. All She had clean forgotten. Now, she said looking at him,nowto herself; lets have it over;meaning that now she would nowdescend to the caves bottom of despair & let the dark waves of humilitybreak; & Then she would come up cringing.Down she went;horror & despair; annihilation; nonentity; sure enough, they archedtheir backs &crashed over her; stooping form, & yet - & yet. Opening her eyesin the pale world of daylight again, she was aware of someprofound small trophy retrieved down there; some talisman shewould sew to the inside of her dress (how the it is things themselvesmatter) not are enduring,indeed ever lasting; how how nothing elseelatednot success,matters;) & opening her eyesshe was so joyousin her freedom& did not the position of thesalt cellar mark somethingnotimportant? - that she said to Mr. Tansley (whom she?wished(supposed she would continue to reverence, for she had nomilitancy in her, did & could not bear to be be called,as she might have been called had she come out with herwas& did noteverything alwayshappen whenone stayedwith theRamsaysviews a feminist,for she thought it safer, easier, lessagitating?threatening to accept things:like that) & she could not bear to be& after all, half one's feelings were differentone never could sayquite what one meant she& one always did accept things:know quiteit was too difficultto say what onemeant )about all this)she said to himWhen was the lighthouse built?She hadwas longing to go to the Lighthouse: did he really think it wouldbe too rough?Certainly, said Mr. Ramsay, it would be far too roughCharles Tansley turned in his chair again.He had aIt would be far too rough, he said;They have beenalwayscomplete contemptfor women. In every age they have beenthe great enemies ofprogress; & reason& freedom.lifewd. be ?tolerable [?]Without women,some sort of civilisationmight be possible.They never letus alone, he thought.It is foolish to saythat a young man has anyAnd his Mrs. Ramsay