211Feb. 22ndX

The children were not anxious. They were absorbed still by the story.One could almost see them both pondering those last words aboutthe little girl dreaming of the bears; & then, as that story faded,suddenly Mrs. Ramsay saw them, both come into their eyesit wassome new wonder - Oh the lighthouse! Yes, they hadsomething pale,ecstaticlit the lighthouse. That Turning she looked across the B bay,& there, sure enough, was that pale light, which, at the moment,almostlightone might mistake for sunshine;but it came & went, overthe sea: first only it came & went, a first two quickstrokes & then one long steady stroke, silvering the waves faintly,for it was still light.begin to ask whether they were

James would think about going to the lighthouse: his& they were not going to the Lighthouse: his father said it was impossibleout of the question:But happily, here was Mildredhe he wd. think[?gloomily]to ?take inoffthem to bed; but Cam & then, shetrusted he would forgetallabout going to the Lighthouse.But she doubted it.Children never forgot anything.

No, they forget nothing, she thought, putting together somepictureshe had cut outof the bits of paper that were strewnabout the floor, - therefrigerator, thegentleman in the yellow shirt front, themowing machine, -& taking her knitting.They forgot nothing.ButShe sighed.It was a great relief when they did go to bed.For now she wasneed not think about anybody for amomentShe could be herself, by herself; & that was what now shehad come often felt the need of - toto think. What then was it? To be alone.And as ithappened that she was more often left alone in the evening,bethe it was familiar to her to watching that lighthouse, as shewas sewing knittinged; & it was the two quick strokes & then& ?itstillthe long stroke. The And Of the three strokes it was the thirdreally felt in sympathy with. The third stroke was[?], lookingup fromher knittingatthink, well, not even
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