149Every throb of this pulse seemed to enclose her & her husband, tohold them together, to give to each that solace which, asunite them toodifferent notes, one high one low, sound together in the air, seems toenvelop them too. Yet as the resonance died away, &someMrs. Ramsay felt the exhaustion of body, [the pulse no longerdissatisfactioncarried so far, & then crept in, some little jar, somefaintly disagreeable sensation. Not that reading aloud thestory of the Three Dwarfs, she asked herself knew precisely what itcame from; nor did she let herself put into words the herdissatisfaction, since it was, she knew, this: when she realised,as she did before she turned the page, how she did that itcame from being so much m finer than he was, &camenot quite liking to be always giving;not quite beingsure of the entire truth of what she said.Universitiesshe made noThey did want him - these universities - &believed implicitly, [?invaluable]lectures, she had no doubt, which made him knownto the young mattered supremely, but in their relation, inher having to give away always so much, in his being always sowerewhendiscomfort, misfit& if people said, He depended so on his herenragedwhereupon shewaswife, she which,knowing him to be in every most ways,Butso great, so good, incensed her. And theynot tobe able to tell him the truth - to be afraid of theso dependentthen she wasindignant -?she, they must seehow utterly heoutshone her inevery way.this of that, to be to fear his knowing that it wasexpensive, med mending the green house roof, tofear his guessing it was not a failure, precisely, hislast book, but not a great but people Mr. Bankes was not,enthusiastic,she knew, quite sure about it, & to have to hideunthings from him, - not that they were big things, only smalldid hide,shedaily things -she must do it; but - thissomehowjust diminished the joy perhaps, of thatgreat joy,makingthat entire joy, being able to -Well, shefalsehoodincapable, of controlthere waswere the seeds of falsehood,
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